Jake & Will: CONTEST WARRIORS

Two filmmakers chasing the dream of producing their first feature film...
...and financing it solely through winning video contests.


8/28/2009

I Am A Fly Killer

As I sit here at my keyboard pondering my own existence and the meaning of life, I come to a realization.

I killed three flies today. In a row. I'm 3 for 3.

Impressive, I know. Part of this realization, however, is that my high rate of fly killing success is no accident. Upon reflection, I use a specific technique to murder flies that delivers CONSISTENT results. And I'm going to share it with you... right now.

My technique is simple but requires a bit of patience, patience you may not yet possess. For example, when you see a fly buzzing around your room, you instinctively know you will not be able to hit it mid flight. It's simply too agile, small, and blurry. So you wait until it lands and is relatively stationary. Then, you strike. But the fly eludes you. Here is what you are doing wrong.

You should hit the fly NOT when it's stationary, but when it suspects you are no longer a threat and begins to go about its business. The moment, for instance, when a squirrel sees a potential predator, disregards it, then goes back to eating/digging/foraging. That fleeting moment between disregard and foraging is where you strike.

One of my kills today landed sideways on a drawer in the kitchen. As I moved towards it, I watched its buggy legs tense up. I kept my movement slow, arching my weapon (a rolled up Vista magazine) at the perfect angle to strike. Then I held myself steady. The bug stared at me for a few seconds, then deeming me no more of a threat than a house plant, began to clean itself. BOOM! That shift in perception, that moment when all of its attention was being transferred onto cleaning himself, was when I struck.

It almost helps to DRAW attention to yourself in order to make the fly, for lack of better word, scared, so that once he believes you are harmless, his (or her) guard is down so low that it ends up costing him (or her) his (or her) life.

Rinse and repeat.

Also, video contests. They're awesome.

-Will

1 comments:

Prince Gomolvilas said...

Get a job.

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